75% Of Good Guys With Guns Fat Enough To Have Heart Attack In Active Shooter Situation

The NRA has decided to focus on health and fitness this week when a study showed that 75% of men who carry guns regularly are not physically fit enough to be of any use during an active shooter situation. A NRA spokesman said “Let’s get real a lot of these dudes carrying guns are fucking fatasses who are big targets that are just going to get themselves shot or more likely to have a heart attack when someone starts shooting.” The NRA says that while they hate this statistic, they do like the fact that if the good guys with gun die of heart attacks during active shooter situations, at least they won’t be killed by guns.