A local man has canceled his plans to volunteer at a Thanksgiving Dinner for the homeless to stay at home and rest up to go on a quest for the best Black Friday deals offered by retailers in his area. The man who plans to go hit up thanksgiving deals offered by soulless corporations says that going to volunteer at the homeless thanksgiving would be just too much when he factors in that he needs to get up at 3AM the next day.
“I know I’m going to be super busy all of Thursday and probably worn out from eating thanksgiving and scurrying around to get Thanksgiving evening deals and I need to rest up for Friday. I think the hungry homeless people would understand that and if they were in my shoes- they’d probably do the same thing,” the man says. As of press time only one person was still committed to preparing and serving the thanksgiving diner at the Hope For All shelter which will consist of corn and crème of celery soup- which by all accounts is actually worse than a normal day’s diner at the shelter.